Image via WikipediaSome people my say whats the big deal in divorce, it the other of the day blah, blah, blah. But there is.That is not for now. Let me finish my story.
The wife now started to talk again to the husband about how they had been married for almost nine years, that was when something finally touched in and i decided to step in and ask them just a question. I introduced myself and i asked a question even a very common one. would you like to know? common read on
I asked both couple separately do you love you spouse and they both answered without hesitation that they did.From there i knew there was hope for their marriage, if they had said no i would have known it would take time for them to recover. Then i asked another question, guess what it was because you know it.
I asked again why do you want to divorce each other and both of them started talking and i shut them up even though i did not hear what they said. You wonder why i asked the second question, yeah i would tell you.
I asked them because i wanted to see the enthusiasm that they would you to answer me and the enthusiasm was great and i knew there was hope.
Instantly i went straight to the point like am gonna do now and i told them that there are just two ways to it if they still loved each other and i told them to listen carefully and i am telling you also to read carefully,
1. Its either they don't love each other enough(I'll explain)
2. They need more than love to sustain their marriage.
Most couple make this common mistake, they think marriage or a relationship would work itself out. NO, NO, NO you work out the marriage.
You don't believe me?Check this out.
Lets say your mum or your dad never supported about your choice of spouse, then you know someone out there is planning for it not to work, though it might not be visible to the eyes.
If majority of your friends are unmarried and they are getting older even than you and you are
beautifully married don't deceive yourself, someone would also be jealous.
SO you see why i say you work out the marriage.
Now back to my point, lets duel on the first one, Its either you don't love your spouse enough.
Most of us have different definitions for love, by the time you google for the definition, you get different meanings but they all boil down to a meaning which is someone you have affection for, no restriction for even without holding back.But it goes beyond that.
There are different reasons we love and marry for. About three quarter marriages claim to be based on love yet they don't stay long why? Simply because they choose the part of love they want to and leave the other parts out of it. You don't get me? alright
Let me illustrate to you when you go to some sites and you want to register by the time you are almost through with it, you would get to a part where they ask you to list your hobbies and they bring down a series of hobbies with check boxes in front of them, then they tell you to check them. You don't check all the boxes because you like all the hobbies, you only check the ones you like and that is the same way we have made love to be.
Most people have brought down a list of love parts for instance, handsome, nice, caring, a good listener e.t.c.When they see this option they click on their check boxes but when they see things like not sexy, easily angered, not so rich e.t.c we leave the check boxes blank.
Now that's where the problem is you can't leave any check box blank when it comes to love, you have to check all if you want your relationship or marriage to work.
All those fragments of love,the ones you like and the ones you don't make up the Love to sustain your marriage, to make it last,and stay strong.
Every human being has the good and bad parts so whenever you say you love someone, you must love the good and the bad no part must be left out.
I know you have been reading and tired or should i leave the other aspect for next time,
I've heard someone over hear is screaming NO,NO. so i would continue but i would be brief also.
Lets take the second point, Where you need more than Love to sustain the marriage or relationship. Let me give a brief illustration, If you are a dad or mom and you have a child that misbehaves a lot, you are not going to give up on the child at all because you love and accept that this is your child and you would give everything to make the child have a great life. Now you need to accept that you have made a choice to marry and marry this particular man, so you have to give it all it takes to work.You need to accept that this is your spouse and you two must be perfect for each other eve though we are all not perfect.
Take a look, i wish i was born into Bill Gates family, not when he dropped out of school, but now that he's been the world richest for a while but i just have to accept that i was not born there and make do with what i have and know.
This is just a tip of the iceberg, but if you are really interested in knowing more about saving your marriage you need to check this out.
Check this out to get full details!
It give you everything you might require in great details, and it lets you realize how you can deal and agree with your spouse.
Its a must read and i guarantee you a happy marriage.
I am sure you know the statistics of divorced couple in a month let alone a year please don't be in that category.
So click here and don't be divorced!
Watch out for the sequel part of this where i would be talking about
"Things to do to make your spouse always prefer you"
If you have any question or you wanna share on this blog, just leave your comments on the blog.
